Washington, DC was just rated the city with the worst drivers in the nation. Baltimore came in second. I totally believe with every fiber of my being that this is wrong. Washington, DC isn't the worst in the nation--it's the worst in all of North America and I am including Nicaragua and Panama. I have no idea how people drive in Nicaragua and Panama, because I've never been there. But they can't drive as badly as people do here. It's a crazy mix of super type A personalities who own the road and people who have no idea where they are going and tend to turn right from the left lane. And then there is the random motorcade that you have to stop for. Although then you can take a picture of the limousine with your cell phone and see if you can see the President in it. (You never can.) It has been this way in DC for a long time. I know because when I Googled images of DC accidents, this is the first one that popped up.
I am a good driver. I have never had an accident while driving. Parking is another matter but I was a teenager, so that shouldn't count. But anyway, I'm a good driver, but I'm a horrible passenger. The kind like my grandmother who was blind and yet still insisted on telling my grandpa to slow down, move over, go faster, what are you waiting for, you're going to hit that car. I so loved my grandmother that I have turned into her. I am constantly gasping and stepping on an imaginary break as if somehow my stomping on the floor is going to magically stop the car and prevent whatever imaginary accident Husband or Child 1 are going to get into. It's so annoying that I would never ever want to ride with me anywhere, and yet I can't help it. I have resorted to sitting in the back seat and playing on my iPod so I can't see or hear the traffic. It's an OK strategy except that I'm supposed to be teaching Child 1 to drive, not hiding in the back seat. But someday soon, Child 1 will have a license and then I can just stand on the side of the road and wave as she drives off. I can't wait.
Lindsay Lohan is having a worse day than me again.
She is off the hook for theft once more, but she ran up a $46,000 hotel bill and then didn't pay it. Yep. Her hotel bill was twice the amount I got paid for my first full-time job. I actually feel quite bad for Lindsay. She was such an adorable kid, and now she's a national joke. So thank you, Lindsay, for reminding me that integrity is important and I will never get kicked out of a hotel for not paying the bill. Also, you spent way too much on the mini-bar.
I am a good driver. I have never had an accident while driving. Parking is another matter but I was a teenager, so that shouldn't count. But anyway, I'm a good driver, but I'm a horrible passenger. The kind like my grandmother who was blind and yet still insisted on telling my grandpa to slow down, move over, go faster, what are you waiting for, you're going to hit that car. I so loved my grandmother that I have turned into her. I am constantly gasping and stepping on an imaginary break as if somehow my stomping on the floor is going to magically stop the car and prevent whatever imaginary accident Husband or Child 1 are going to get into. It's so annoying that I would never ever want to ride with me anywhere, and yet I can't help it. I have resorted to sitting in the back seat and playing on my iPod so I can't see or hear the traffic. It's an OK strategy except that I'm supposed to be teaching Child 1 to drive, not hiding in the back seat. But someday soon, Child 1 will have a license and then I can just stand on the side of the road and wave as she drives off. I can't wait.
Lindsay Lohan is having a worse day than me again.
She is off the hook for theft once more, but she ran up a $46,000 hotel bill and then didn't pay it. Yep. Her hotel bill was twice the amount I got paid for my first full-time job. I actually feel quite bad for Lindsay. She was such an adorable kid, and now she's a national joke. So thank you, Lindsay, for reminding me that integrity is important and I will never get kicked out of a hotel for not paying the bill. Also, you spent way too much on the mini-bar.
Please tell Child #1 that I am very sorry, but no, she is not allowed to drive. Nothing personal, since I know she's quite the responsible young lady, but we already have quite enough people in front of me on the roads. Plus Metro needs the business.
ReplyDeletexoxo,
Artemis