Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Bad Day 336--Current events are not history

I am helping Child 1 study for her "American History" exam which covers things that I was alive for and therefore could not possibly be history. When I took history as a class, all history ended with the Vietnam War which we usually got to about 3 days before the end of school and just skimmed over. Most of what I know about the Vietnam War comes from reading books on my own and actually going to Vietnam. I have been to the Hanoi Hilton--both the prison and the hotel. The hotel was lovely. The prison was a pit, which was the point. It was originally built by the French. The theme of our vacation in Vietnam was "the Americans weren't as bad as the French." Because that is what people told us over and over. I have no idea if that is actually true, but it's what the Vietnamese who talked to us told us to make us feel better, or maybe to get us to spend more money.

Anyway, Child 1's "history" class also covers things like the Iran Hostage Crisis and the INF treaty, and SDI, and Desert Storm and NAFTA--all of which I refuse to believe are historic because I remember them. And I refuse to admit I am old enough to be part of history. I know who Gorbachev is. He is still alive.

So is President Jimmy Carter. I met him and First Lady Rosalynn and she complimented me on my necklace. (Artemis says the only thing that surpasses my shoe collection is my jewelry. This is why I love Artemis so very much.) But how can it be history if I was alive and cognizant? (OK, just barely cognizant. I got mad at the Camp David Accords for interrupting the Muppet Show.) I certainly don't look or dress historic, although my new gray dress and "in lieu of a reward" shoes definitely have a Mad Men vibe to them. I wore them again today and three people complimented me on my shoes, so I know they are awesome. Also, they make me almost 6 feet tall and for once, it is fun to look down on people--literally, not figuratively. Also, I got offered a TDY to Africa in the future, so I think they bring me luck. Navy swiss dot platform peep toes are way better than some dumb old award certificate to put on my wall. Right?

These airline passengers in Las Vegas are having a worse day than me.

There is a heat wave in Vegas and it has been over 100 F for a while. The first plane was stuck on the tarmac for two hours. Then the second plane they switched to also had mechanical problems and left them without air conditioning and they ran out of water. But instead of becoming unruly, they started singing. "I Believe I Can Fly" by R. Kelly was their song of choice, which is really, really funny. So thank you, Musical Passengers, for reminding me that we are still a civilized society and that humor makes lots of bad things better, and also for making me very grateful that I have not been stuck in Las Vegas in a plane without air conditioning. Although if I ever am, "Cooler than me" would probably be my song of choice.


  1. Hah! You only SAY you love me. If you really did, you'd **give** me your jewelry collection. Why? Because your shoes won't fit.


    p.s. Check out http://jewelry.novica.com/

    1. Hey! I was your personal shopper in China and brought you back a bagful of jewelry. That should give you at least a start! Recognize my Star Trek earrings from that site?