Saturday, September 1, 2012

Bad Day 53--It's a rich man's world

I think all of China came to DC to go shopping this weekend. This may be my fault since I gave them all visas when I was in China in June. But I haven't heard so much Chinese in one place since I was in China than at the outlet mall today. And everyone had bags and bags and bags of things, so my plan to solve the trade deficit by encouraging the Chinese to come spend money in America is working! Shopping at the outlets is always fun, but the people watching is the best. My favorite view of the day was the diplomat in the designer suit surrounded by bags from True Religion and Kate Spade on the phone trying to find his driver. I think he must have had 20 bags and I have no idea how he got them all to the curb, but women in his life are going to be very happy. (No, that was not a sexist comment--merely an observation. What on earth would men buy for themselves in a Kate Spade store?) This is a picture of what shopping in China is like. The outlets were only a little less crowded than this.

We were buying Husband some long sleeve 100% cotton shirts for Afghanistan. Apparently, when you go on missions in Afghanistan (which is what the military calls "meetings" but it sounds much cooler and getting there is more dangerous thus "mission",) you need to wear only natural clothing. This is because polyester and other man-made fibers melt in fire and will make your burns worse. That is something I hadn't ever thought about and definitely didn't want to know, but since my life is now knowing these things, I am fully on board with sparing Husband from possible 3rd degree burns from his clothing. If you are looking for attractive long sleeve 100% cotton shirts, then Bass and Eddie Bauer are the places to go.  Not that anyone in Afghanistan will care what Husband's shirts look like, but I will feel better if I send him off with nice-looking clothes, and maybe someone will notice his shirt and he'll say that his wife picked it out for him and that will make him remember me.

But besides the shirts and cargo pants (which are also necessary because you have to have a place to put your satellite phone) I managed to find pants that fit AND they were a size smaller than I used to be! So either clothes are getting bigger, (which is entirely possible because the fashion industry wants us to feel good about ourselves so we will spend more money and we are just vain enough that this works like magic) or I really have lost weight. So I bought a pair of black denim trousers and they look really cute and I didn't cry at all after trying them on.

Child 3 was with us and got two pairs of Converse. For those of you without children, Converse is the required shoe for the first day of school. Everyone who is everyone wears Converse. Adidas or Vans might be an acceptable substitute occasionally, but if you want to fit in in middle school or high school in America, you must have Converse. Sometimes I miss school uniforms because the year they had to wear uniforms it was really, really easy getting them ready for school in the morning. Do you want to wear the uniform shirt with the long sleeves, or the short sleeves? Navy blue skirt or pants? Easy. But now, even though everyone in high school all wears the same uniform of shirt, skinny jeans, and Converse, there are still too many choices for anyone to be ready for school on time and we are in a panic every single morning before school that someone is going to miss the bus and that someone is usually me because I am looking for the thing they cannot find because they aren't really looking. (Standing in the middle of the room and staring into space is not looking!) I am apparently the only person in the entire house who knows where anything is and why can't the children  figure out that if one shoe was in the downstairs closet, then the other one is probably there, too? I am so not looking forward to the beginning of school on Tuesday.

Henri the cat is having a worse day than me.

He is having an existential crisis in French--with subtitles. I normally don't like internet cat videos, but this is a masterpiece. So thank you, Henri, for reminding me to be grateful that I am not a tortured cat surrounded by morons.

1 comment:

  1. Adonis has *never* bought me Kate Spode. I have bought him 100% cotten, long-sleeved shirts so he could leave me lonely.

    What's wrong with this picture?